I Get It.

It is no big secret that growing up Amy, Jenny and I had moments where we didn't get along. As I am sure is true of siblings in all families. When I think back to the arguments, particularly between Amy and I, a large number of them were because I felt our parents were stricter on me (being the first born) and were much easier on them. Irrational and overblown or not, that was how I felt. And at some point I vowed that when I had kids everything would be fair and exactly equal at all times.

Well, you know what, I have quickly learned that despite best efforts it is just not that simple. As we were leaving the Dr yesterday after flu shots the girls each picked a lollipop as a treat for being brave (no crying!!). It hit me that when Maya was this age, I certainly didn't allow the lollipop treat and just let her pick from the stickers. She was none the wiser. Yet, here I was, letting Laurel pick a lollipop out for herself. Yes, it was going to be a big sticky mess and no, she really doesn't need the sugar, but could I allow one for Maya and turn her down? Nope. I sure could not.

"Fair" has taken on a different meaning. It is not easy to balance the needs of two kids with different ages and do things exactly the same way you did the first time. Life is different, circumstances are different and children are different. The lollipop is certainly not the only thing Laurel has been allowed to do that Maya wasn't at this same age.

Mom and Dad, I am sure you explained this to me many times along the way, but I finally get it.  It is all about balance.  Pick the important things to set age limits and boundries on, keep consistent on the things that matter most and let the rest go. Maya is too young to care about this now, but as she and Laurel grow, I hope to be as successful at this as you were with us.  My biggest hope for my girls is that despite any rough patches, they grow up friends because the support of a sister is an amazing thing. I hope I can help them along the way, but they are already off to a great start.

Winding down together before bed time.

Go huskies!  Laurel was so excited to be wearing the same kitty shirt as Maya, she kept pointing at them both and grinning.